Absent – Poetry/Prose #napowrimo

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Absent
by SM CADMAN
Poetry/Prose

I miss you but not in the way you think…
I hate myself for feeling that way too.
The painful, selfish agonizing nights–
Spent worried about me and you
Have been a plague pruning away
Inch by inch, at my neurons and dendrites
Making me stupidly sick,
Wanting to escape beyond the invisible
Barb-wired fence, you contaminated
My soul, my mind, the worst
Excruciating, slow-moving death.

I jumped on command, I tip-toed around
The discards of shattered glass that were
Always your life, that became my life; and our life.
Yet still I am quieted to tell your truth;
To be even angry enough yell out my own.
No one would believe the words
Shot out of my mouth, so I bite my lip
From screaming the reality you chose to
Control my life; our life, now gone
In less than one terrified breath…
But finally,
I am free.

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